Movie Box #5: Best and Worst I've seen so far this year.

So the Summer movie season is almost over as July is starting and the majority of the big blockbuster movies have come out already and also it's given some time for my lazy ass to catch up on movies I may have missed last year (tragic I know). So anyway so begins my best and worst list of movies where I get to act like an obnoxious, pretentious douche critic! Enjoy!

BEST SO FAR:

Man of Steel: Yeah I know that this has been 50/50 with movie critics, mainstream audiences and most importantly the comic geeks, I fall with the geeks (you can tell if you read this blog (which I'm sure is barely a handful)) and I thought the movie was amazing. Yes it's a darker take on the Superman and realistic in the First Contact sci-fi movie type of way, but I really thought the cast was great. Some of the choices Clark made in the movie I thought helped with his character development. There definitely could of been more development, but I'll wait for that in the sequel. All I've wanted since I was kid is to see Superman in action and not stoping some stupid land development schemes. And the ending? I was shocked at first, but was okay with it after you saw Superman's reaction to what he was forced to do. So all in all one of my favorite movies of the summer.

This is the End: Fucking hilarious is all I really have to say about this. It got a little slow towards the end, but definitely had a lot memorable scenes and lines to quote. Danny Mcbride, Michael Cera and James Franco were I think the highlights of the movie. Everyone should watch this and if your wife or girlfriend aren't to fond for this type of humor they'll enjoy the surprise at the end.

Star Trek: Into Darkness: I'm a Star Wars guy hand down. Star Trek wise, I did enjoy the Next Generation cast. Movies, though, I didn't become a fan until the J.J. Abrams movie. Traditional Trekkie fans I've heard hated this movie, but screw them. I thought it was awesome. Definitely a must see.

Silver Lining Playbook: I everyone's seen this and know it's great.

If you plan on having a Red Box or Netflix type of Night:

The Inbetweeners Movie: If you enjoy the BBC show, you'll enjoy this. Will always cracks me up.

Seven Psychopaths: Not as laugh out loud funny as the trailer tried to advertise it as, but was surprisingly decent. It's definitely a different type of movie and not everyone will get it or enjoy, but I would still recommend it. Sam Rockwell is great in it.

21 & Over: Was definitely surprised I enjoyed this. I thought it was going to suck since other then the first Hangover movie, the people involved with that movie and all their movies after the first have completely sucked. This movie however actually delivered on some decent laughs with a predictable ending that usually comes with these type of movies.

Turn Your Brain off and Enjoy Movie of the Month

A Good Day to Die Hard: It's John McClane killing terrorists. That's all the story you need. 

Disappointing Movies

Side Effects: Yet another case of don't trust critics. Had some surprise twists, but ultimately I never really gave a shit about what was happening to these characters. I rooted for Jude Law to come out on top, but most of the movie my girlfriend and I treated it as an opportunity to have our own Mystery Science Theater segment. True Story.

Iron Man 3: Felt too much like a Disney PG-13 movie like Pirates and Prince of Persia. While I enjoyed some of the jokes in this as well as the Avengers. I feel the marvel movies try to hard to appeal to everyone and not take chances with their movies and push the envelope with maybe adding darker elements or committing fully to different type of genres (Captain America didn't feel like a period piece to me). So I thought this movie in particular was being hyped as Dark Knight type of movie with Iron Man fighting his Joker level enemy and completely fucked up the opportunity. They really just treated this movie as a way to make a satire of the one of the greatest comic book movies ever and try to continue a trend of comedy that started with Avengers and over use it in this one. Was really disappointed in this movie. Could of been a lot better.

Worst Movies:

Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters

Jake Reacher

Identity Theft

Savages

This is 40

After Earth

Nerd Alert #12: End of an Era... 9 years of Green Lantern....

So last week, May 22nd, Geoff Johns' Green Lantern epic came to a close. 9 years of story finally came to a close and it was absolutely incredible. Now up until 2004 I was never really a big lantern fan. I liked Kyle Rayner, mainly because of Morrison's JLA, but never was able to get interested in his title. Then the Rebirth mini-series was announced. It had Ethan Van Sciver on art which drew my attention, because I loved the issues he drew in New X-Men, and it had Geoff Johns writing. I was already a fan Johns' work on Teen Titans and Flash so I was hoping this would be good. Now I didn't really grow up with Hal Jordan as Green Lantern. When I started reading comics he soon after went nuts and became the villain Parallax. So I wasn't all that excited that the series' main purpose was to bring Hal Jordan back from the dead and make him a Green Lantern again. How wrong I was. Instead of following the cliche route of having Kyle Rayner get killed off so Hal could return, Johns' opted to design the series as a rebirth to Lantern Mythos as much a of rebirth for Hal. Johns' Green Lantern epic is the only reason I'm a huge fan Green Lantern. Everything he built along with the writers and artists he collaborated with on the main Lantern book and the spin off titles that later were released are pretty much everything you would want in an epic. It has everything. Drama, violence, sci-fi, and moral philosophical clashes. The central theme of the entire run was overcoming fear, which is what Hal Jordan is all about. Which is why Hal Jordan became such a great and relatable hero in a post 9-11 world. What Johns' also ushered in was the emergence of Sinestro as a one note villain to one of the most compelling characters that you'll ever read and move him into the upper echelon of DC villains with the likes of Lex Luthor and The Joker. Johns' run is constructed similar to the Star Wars saga in sense of, if you're normal, you'd watch the OG trilogy first then the prequel last. Rebirth was Johns' New Hope, Sinestro Corps War was his Empire Strikes Back and Blackest Night was his Return of the Jedi. These three story arcs (actually events) are the highlights of the run. You have the creation of the other lantern corps, the emotional spectrum, Black Hand and Nekron becoming big name villains instead of jokes, and the fact Green Lantern now had is own family of books and carried a Summer Event crossover which was usually designated to Superman, Batman and the Justice League. After Blackest Night the book transitioned to Brightest Day which became it's own series while the Green Lantern books did their own thing and began the next trilogy of the events that which would eventually lead to the finale. In this time we saw Sinestro become a Green Lantern again and the book became an awesome dysfunctional buddy cop movie with Hal and Sinestro. Which really showed the great dynamic between these two characters and made the book even better than it already was. As the book began leading to the final two big story arcs within the family of titles Johns' took Hal and Sinestro off the board temporarily and introduce a new Muslim Lantern named Simon Baz who became just as interesting as the other earth lanterns. At the end of the day though everything Johns added change the mythos and made the character live up to the sci-fi standards a book like this should have. With the corruption of the Guardians, the different lantern corps, all the new characters that were introduced, the white lantern, and the reinvention of villains this run will be remembered as one of the greatest runs in comics. Even though the movie fell short this run is the reason why we had that movie, a video game, two animated movies and an animated series. That's all owed to Geoff Johns and the creators that helped with this epic for the last nine years. So do yourself a favor an read it!

Graphic Novel Reading Order

Green Lantern: Rebirth, No Fear, Revenge of the Green Lanterns, Wanted: Hal Jordan, Sinestro Corps War, Secret Origin, Rage of the Red Lanterns, Agent Orange, Blackest Night, Blackest Night: Green Lantern, Brightest Day, War of the Green Lanterns, Sinestro, Revenge of Black Hand, The End

Green Lantern Corps: Recharge, To be a Lantern, The Dark Side of Green, Ring Quest, Sins of the Star Sapphires, Emerald Eclipse, Blackest Night: GLC, Revolt of the Alpha Lanterns, The Weaponer, War of the Green Lanterns Aftermath, Fearsome, Alpha War, Willpower

Green Lantern: Emerald Warriors 

Green Lantern New Guardians: The Ring Bearer, Beyond Hope, Love & Death

Red Lanterns: Blood and Rage, Death of the Red Lanterns, Rise of the Third Army

So this is how Skynet takes over.... Smartphones.

So like the majority of the people of the world I have a smartphone. As much as I love my phone I can't help but notice they are making us dumber. One I look like a fucking zombie. I can sit in a room with people and the majority of the time I'm in that room we're all on our phones looking at stupid shit, majority of the time aren't emails or text messages. All sense of a normal social atmosphere has slowly started to die in our society. Plus since you can find everything on the internet on our phone apparently all knowledge and common sense goes out the window. I saw this one dumb ass looking for a light bulb. Instead of being intelligent and bringing said light bulb to the store with him he takes a picture of bulb still in the fixture and shows that picture trying to find the correct bulb. Then looks shocked that he should know what the wattage is. Had to hold back my rage and not punch this stupid jackass in the face. What's even better is when these idiots are talking to you, but can't take their eyes away from their
phone and be respectful and look you in the eye. Worst yet are the over 40 crowd who buy smart phones. It's bad enough that they get dumber as they get older, even though they still think they're always right and will argue with you till you get tired of arguing and let them win, but now they have smartphones! It's always sadly hilarious watching these people try to use their phone and fail miserable trying to figure out technology. And don't get me started on the text messaging! I'm guilty of it also, but at least I try to fix the problem by trying to improve my grammar in the messages and make it convey that I'm educated and not coasting on a GED or a high school drop out. This generations of teenagers are going to turn out to be the dumbest, laziest, and just all around shit people will ever see. If whatever percentage of you think that were fucked as country with the Obama administration, then just imagine how bad it will be when these fuckers grow up and join the real world. *shudder*

Guys and short shorts, and how it's all Magnum P.I.'s fault.....

So yeah. I don't get this whole guys wearing short shorts thing. I would blame Wham!, but they had more of a female audience (I guess that includes gay guys) than a male audience. No, there's one man to blame for this and his name is Magnum P.I. I know, I know the show ran in the 80's, but come on! Who hasn't watched this show?! I mean the main thing that should be taken away from this show is of course the magnificent mustache. I'm pretty sure Mags' stache was hand crafted by Leonardo and blessed by Odin himself. It saddens me that the other thing taken from this show was Magnum's unfortunate choice of wearing short shorts. I'm sorry Magnum P.I. is supposed to be a bad ass, and bad asses don't wear short shorts. I give Magnum the benefit of the doubt since it was the 80's, which had better music than fashion. Today though,  we are in the year 2011. The 21st Century. A time where the only acceptable length is 2 or 3 inches above the knee, and maybe long enough to cover up the knee a little or completely, but no longer. The weird guys who wear shorts that are really long to the point that they look like their wearing capris falls into the unacceptable category. Magnum P.I.'s success in the 80's affected the male audience who watched judgements into wearing short shorts that has clearly carried onto their children and whatever fraternity they were a part of. You see douchebags in Buckhead and some parts downtown wearing their short khaki shorts (and visors, which is a rant for another day) looking like they're going to a Revenge of the Nerds Tribute Costume party celebrating the douchebagness of the Alpha Betas. As bad as those idiots are though, nothing compares to the most offensive perpetrators. We all know these type of assholes. The dreaded Guy who likes to run who wears extremely unnecessary short shorts. You know, the shorts that only hot chicks who go jogging should wear. Why do these idiots wear these? And they wear them at the pool! Where children go to swim! It's terrible and they always make you uncomfortable. Plus if one of them decides to talk to you, there's the risk of them being close talkers (shudder). It's unfortunate that a great show from the 80's like Magnum P.I. ends up having something as awful as the guys wearing short shorts trends connected to it. I think if Magnum could do it all over again I think he would rethink his wardrobe choice. I mean jeans go well with hawaiian shirts right?

Sometimes TV series need to know when to quit you instead of dragging it out....

So I'm currently re-watching my seasons of Weeds and it's occurred to me that this show, as much as I love it and others, need to know when it's time for them to end. I know that the studios that produce these shows pretty much control this issue, even though in interviews the creators claim that they ultimately decide when their shows come to an end, but sometimes it doesn't seem like the case. It's hard to pass up a big contract promising more money to keep your show going. And also I'm not going to try to understand how all this shit goes down in Hollywood, I'm just a simple man on his laptop voicing my opinion. From re-watching Weeds and some of the new episodes, I've come to conclusion that this show should end this season even though it hasn't been announced and I think they're planning an 8th. Much as I love watching Nancy Botwin and all the situations she puts her family and friends in leading to disastrous results, the show has in my opinion, reached all the possible storylines they could do with this show. That includes what I've seen of this season so far. Which makes me wonder if creators really do have an ending mind when they create these shows or it's all bullshit when the say so in interviews. A perfect example of this is Lost. The creators always went on record of having an ending and it was going to last five seasons, but they ended up dividing the 5th season to do a 6th season and drag out the story. The last season, as much as I enjoyed it, just seemed to add more mysteries to an already long list of mysteries. The final episode didn't close out a lot of them. I have a love/hate relationship with the final episode. Love how all the characters stories ended, but hated how the mystery of the island was never even answered or any attempt was made to answer it. Which made me conclude that they never had any explanation for it and was banking on people caring more about what happened to the characters than the overall mystery of the island. Which, if true, is pretty fucking stupid. This is what worries me about Weeds and other shows I enjoy that are ending this year.
Take for example Rescue Me. One of, if not my favorite show of all time. Season 6 should of been the final season of that series. Did I enjoy the season? Sure, but I have a feeling that after this final season we'll look back and say, "Maybe they should've combined seasons 6 and 7 to be the final season." I say this because some storylines weren't too terribly interesting or just seemed like it's been done before. The Shield was guilty of this. Season 6 wasn't that bad, but overall it seemed sort of directionless and the finale was flat. Season 7 was much better than 6, but also dragged out storylines more than they should have. I think the show would've benefited from combining the two into one 13 to 15 episode season. I mean, the Shane and family as fugitive arc went on longer than it should have and made you stop caring about what happened to them. Other than that minor quibble, The Shield had a satisfying series finale. The fact that in two episodes they were able to change the tone of the show from you rooting for Vic Mackey to thinking he's an evil son of a bitch who just used people, was pretty incredible.  Also, isn't it an interesting dichotomy in our society that a majority of us hate cops, I mean we respect their profession, but we just dislike them. With that feeling in mind we also love watching shows and movies about them. I find it interesting. I know right? Sorry I was talking to my inner monologue. His name's Montgomery and we have a rollicking good time together (to quote the Joker, "I'm not crazy. I'm..... not.)

So I guess what I'm getting at is we all have a fear that shows we have invested in either wear out their welcome (That 70's show, X-Files) or end up ending in a disappointing or conflicting way (Lost, Seinfeld). As long as Entourage and Rescue Me don't fall into the latter category I'll be happy. Friday Night Lights proved they can end with an amazing finale. As long as they don't sell out like Scrubs did when they came out with that bullshit "Final Season", when they became teachers after the year before's finale should of been the series finale. That was one of the most satisfying finales I've ever seen, but was ruined because they rather drag the show out and end it on low note because ABC thru some cash at them. I mean shit, you're already rich from the successes of the previous seasons! Don't be money grubbing whores. Aw well, Hakuna Matata!

Nerd Alert #11 - The movies are popular for a reason..... Jump on board if you dare...

Grant Morrison's Batman Run (plus other books that add to the story)
Taking cues from the Nolanverse of Batman movies and the out there concepts of the sci-fi era of Batman books, Morrison has weaved an epic (that concludes at the end of 2012) that has reinvigorated and made the Batman line of books the most interesting and original they've been since the No Man's Land era from way back in '99. From a character study of Bruce Wayne and the Joker (who is at his best in this run), to expanding on the history of the Wayne family and Gotham itself, to taking a character, Damian Wayne, who everyone hated to becoming one of the most unique and interesting Robin's ever, and finally, adding more and showcasing how awesome Dick Grayson and Tim Drake are. Also not to forget the fantastic new status quo with the creation of Batman Inc. Batmen in every country and all the new interesting characters that have come out of this. It's true the first half of the story is kinda confusing at first, with the inclusion of Final Crisis, but that's part of the fun of the whole story. It makes you think and really invest in the story and being rewarded with the outcome. So if your looking for a original and fun Batman experience than check out these books.

Batman and Son, Resurrection of Ra's al Ghul, The Black Glove, Batman R.I.P., Final Crisis, Batman & Robin: Batman Reborn, Red Robin: The Grail, Red Robin: Collision, Batman & Robin: Batman vs Robin, Time and the Batman, Return of Bruce Wayne, Batman & Robin: Batman & Robin Must Die, Batman Inc. Vol. 1, Batman Inc: Demon Star, Batman: Gotham's Most Wanted

Pride of Baghdad and Y: The Last Man by Brian K. Vaughn, Niko Henrichon and Pia Guerra 

Pride of Baghdad is the story of a Pride of lions that escaped the Baghdad Zoo during the American bombing raid in 2003. This story is mainly about survival and the desire to be free, also using the interactions between the different animals as a metaphor for the political nuances that happen in the modern world. The book does a great job of establishing these lions' character and make you care about what happens to these lions. If you know the news story of what happened to these lions then you already know the end, but the journey that gets you to that end point is what makes this an incredible read. Also, make sure you take time to appreciate the amazing artwork by Niko Henrichon. His artwork is absolutely beautiful. Highly recommended.

Y: The Last Man is one of the true classics to come from DC Comics' Vertigo line. It's takes the last man on earth concept and makes it into a globetrotting mystery of trying to figure out how all the men died. Also it's an interesting study of how the world would be like if there was only women in the world. Starting with the shock and trying to adjust to the chaos that has just been put on their doorsteps and how they begin to make steps of trying to bring peace and order to this new world. All the while Yorick, Agent 355, and Dr. Mann (the main characters) try to find out the reason the men died and how they can possibly clone Yorick so humanity can continue to live on. The series is completely heartwarming, hilarious, action packed, and engaging that keeps you wanting more as you read the collected books. Also, around the third hardback collection, I realized that Yorick and I are close to being the same person, with the humor, pop culture references, and overall personality. Except all the escape artists stuff. Do yourself a favor and read this series. If it doesn't make you a fan of graphic novels and show you how amazing a medium this is then there is something seriously wrong with you.

Paperbacks - 10 Volumes Hardbacks - 5 Volumes 

Sleeper by Ed Brubaker and Sean Phillips

Sleeper is an amazing crime noir/espionage book that follows the character Holden Carver as he's gone undercover in a supervillain terrorists group run by Tao. As it gets deeper and deeper into the organization he sees him get more conflicted and questioning his morals as he begins to question his loyalty to the government he works for and even Tao himself. It has ties to other comic series in the Wildstorm universe (that's now defunct and mixed into the DC line of superheroes), but you really don't need to know about any of those to enjoy the book. The book does a great job of immersing you into this world and it's characters and takes you on a journey that has twist and turns you don't see coming and keep you coming back for more. Highly recommended.

Paperbacks - Sleeper Season One and Sleeper Season Two

If you're looking for a good movie adaptation you're probably smurf out of luck...

So with the announcement I read today that they're going to make a Captain Planet movie, even though I thought the show sucked as a kid, it got me cringing again at the fact that Hollywood's going to fuck up another childhood cartoon we all used to enjoy. First it was Scooby Doo, which was beyond awful. I don't count the Flintstones movie, because  I liked that. I mean you got John Goodman and Rick Moranis, what's not to love? Anyway, first Scooby, then Garfield, which somehow both of these have churned out sequels carrying on the corny awfulness. I mean did anyone watch Underdog or Fat Albert? You probably didn't, cuz the trailers, thankfully showed you how awful the movies were going to be. Plus any movie starring Kenan Thompson you just know is going to suck cuz the man is NOT funny. I'm not even going to get into Alvin and the Chipmunks. My disdain for those movies and how the chipmunks are portrayed still angers me. If I wanted to watch a movie with talking chipmunks I'll watch Chip n' Dale.  I mean they were the size of children in the show! Also, what the hell happened to Jason Lee? Seriously? How irrelevant has that guy become? Sometimes I forget that he played one of my all time favorite characters, Brody, in Mallrats. Guess that's what happens when you decide playing a redneck in a bad TV show is a good career move. Now this brings me to the Smurfs. The Smurfs, one of the cornerstones of cartoon shows we all watched as children, and if your one of those pretentious jerk offs who claim you never watched it cuz "you were outside all time", making it sound like playing outside wasn't common place when we were all kids and that your better then every one because you were outside all time, then you are a fucking liar and can go fuck yourself and you're going to probably die of skin cancer anyway. Whew! Anyway, looking at the trailer, not even NPH can save this movie. I don't get what goes into the mind Hollywood screenwriters when they adapt these movies. It's like they've learned nothing from the Pixar or Shrek movies. Or for that matter, all the Looney Tunes shows that have been out. If they paid attention to how they handle humor and actually making it funny for the entire audience they would make better movies. It's like their overly trying to dumb down the material because they think children won't be able to handle the movie if they made it a little more sophisticated. I mean I know nowadays we have more overbearing and close minded parents who feel the need to censor everything from their children like their amish or something, which come to think of it is probably why these movies suck so much. I finally figured out why these are done so poorly and make you feel dumber after watching them! I was wondering why because it seems like more and more these days that people have lost all sense of imagination and wonder and are more concerned with everything being more realistic. It's like they've lost that sense of enjoyment when you take a minute or two out of your day (or longer) and just escape into your imagination, whether it be a book, comic, or movie. Anyway, I wish Hollywood would just leave these shows alone and actually come up with original ideas. What a concept....

Jukebox #19 - Albums that have been awesome since Feb. 26th.

Iron On - Oh the Romance
Alexander - Alexander
Arctic Monkeys - Suck it and See
Death Cab for Cutie - Codes and Keys
Foo Fighters - Wasting Light
Foster the People - Torches
Friendly Fires - Pala LP
An Horse - Walls
The Sounds - Something to Die For
The Strokes - Angles
Taking Back Sunday - Taking Back Sunday
TV on the Radio - Nine Types of Light

Ah Joker, you embody the whole "I don't want to grow up, I'm a Toys R'Us kid!"